This post was contributed by a community member. The views expressed here are the author's own.

Health & Fitness

Connecting With Loved Ones Over The Holidays

For many of us, the holidays are a chance to spend time with family members we don’t see as often as we would like. Visits with aging parents can provide the ideal opportunity for us to observe how they are doing and have a conversation with them about their well being.  If you live long distance, or don’t see your parents regularly, you may be surprised by changes you notice in their physical appearance or mental condition.  Be sure to take the time to talk with them and ask questions if you are concerned.  Here are some tips to consider. 

Look for warning signs in their physical appearance

Weight loss may be a sign of illness or malnourishment.   Are they stable on their feet?  Is there a change in their speech or ambulation? Are they able to take care of their activities of daily living, such as cook, dress, bathe, and clean their home? If any warning signs are evident, help schedule a visit with their physician and plan to go with them.  

Find out what's happening in Farmington-Farmington Hillswith free, real-time updates from Patch.

Look for changes in their mood or mental alertness

Forgetfulness and confusion are not a normal part of aging.  If your parents are repeating themselves frequently or appear more confused, look for other signs that may indicate they are in need additional help. 

Find out what's happening in Farmington-Farmington Hillswith free, real-time updates from Patch.

Are their bills being paid? 

Are there checks in their checkbook to people you are not familiar with? 

Are they entering contests? 

Are their prescriptions current?

Is their nutritious food in the cupboard?

How is their mood?   

Do they engage in conversation?

Do they laugh at funny stories? 

Do they cry often?

Are they drinking more alcohol? 

Are they irritable or get angry quickly? 

Do they appear clean and dress like they always did? 

Are they refusing to go with friends on outings, or to their church or synagogue?  

Changes in their mood or mental alertness may be signs of depression, dementia or a declining health condition.  Again, schedule an appointment with a physician and plan to go with them.  

Be honest

If you are concerned about a parent s’ well being, don’t be afraid to tell them.  Express how you are feeling using “I.”  For example, “I am concerned about your diet, you’ve lost weight.” Or “I noticed Dad’s clothes are not clean today.  Are you having trouble doing the laundry?  What can I do to help?” Or “I noticed you call me often and forget that we talked.  Are you concerned about your memory?  I am.”

Listen carefully and tell your parent/s that you respect their independence

When older adults complain about vague symptoms sometimes they are telling you that they are scared or lonely.  Listen carefully.  Reassure them that you respect their privacy but that you may need to know important information in order to help them if there is an emergency.

Where to turn for more resources and information

The Area Agency on Aging 1-B (AAA 1-B) is a trusted, unbiased, nonprofit organization that specializes in providing information, resources, and services to older adults, persons with disabilities, and their family caregivers, who live in  Livingston, Macomb, Monroe, Oakland, St. Clair and Washtenaw counties.  For information about  respite relief services, housing, in-home services, home delivered meals, care management, legal assistance, counseling, transportation, Medicare, Medicaid and more, call the AAA 1-B Monday through Friday, from 8:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m., at 800-852-7795, or visit www.aaa1b.com






We’ve removed the ability to reply as we work to make improvements. Learn more here

The views expressed in this post are the author's own. Want to post on Patch?

More from Farmington-Farmington Hills